Listen

My routine has gone out the window. In the past few months, we’ve gone through so many changes it’s hard to keep track.

In March, we began preparing the sale of the house. A lot goes into that process. Clean up. Painting. Fixing the lighting. Getting the house in tip top shape for the buyers. Once we decided to sell, simultaneously, we began searching for a house. That also takes up a lot of time. Research, going to look at places, putting in bids, losing, starting all over again.

That all finished near the end of April, I think. Then we moved out of the house at the end of April. For two months, my entire routine was gone. Then we Continue reading “Listen”

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Confidence

I never loiter anymore. It used to be one of my favourite past times. I don’t think I knew it at the time. I simply liked hanging out with my friends. It didn’t really matter where we are. I used to loiter on the front porch with friends in Brooklyn. I did it at parks in Hamilton. I would always hang out with friends outside the gym at university. This could go on for hours and oftentimes, it did.

I recall one time an acquaintance of mine asked if we had nothing better to do because we were just standing around “Wasting time.” I didn’t see it that way. Hanging out with friends, making jokes, talking about whatever, was not a waste of time in my opinion.

I miss it. Nowadays, all my friends are busy. Even though some of us live close to each other we see each other less and less. There are times we see each other at the gym but those are instances when we go to workout or play basketball. Since we are all working and have other commitments and responsibilities, we don’t just run into each other near the cafeteria and hang out for a few hours. We have to make time now.

It’s not always easy to make the time. Luckily, the past few days I was able to hang out with my two close friends individually. I had amazing conversations with both of them. I’m glad we were able to make time to talk. At the end of the one conversation my friend said Continue reading “Confidence”

Social Norms

What am I going to write about? Sometimes while I write I surprise myself with the ending. Somehow, I tie it all together. Or maybe I just think I do a good job of it. That’s enough for me right now.

We saw our place for the first time as the homeowners. My parents and sister saw it for the first time too. I could see the pride my dad had for me. It was a great feeling. Eliz was measuring everything like crazy and making her plans. She’s been working with her mom to put together a brand-new floor-plan. I’ve seen her work in the past and I can’t wait to see how she is planning to utilize all the space we have now.

I seriously have nowhere to go with this. At times, I think, this is a great thing to blog about but when I sit down to write, it doesn’t come to mind. I don’t wait for it either. I think if I were to just sit here and wait it wouldn’t be a pleasurable experience. I don’t want to think too much about what I’m writing. I don’t really have anyone proofread my work. I simply look out for the obvious spelling mistakes. Also, Word is helpful enough with the red and blue lines now that point out spelling and grammatical errors, respectively.

If I wanted to, I know I could ask a friend of mine to help me proofread. He has a great way with words. I aspire to be at that level. The more I read the wider my vocabulary gets. However, I feel pretentious Continue reading “Social Norms”

Turkish Bath Mitten

Let me give you the setting of this post. I just took a 30-minute hot bath. My legs were hurting today and I thought the heat would help. Worked like a charm. After the hot bath, I used a Turkish Bath Mitten to scrub dead skin off my body and took a freezing cold shower.

As I sit here, I’m wearing my swimming shorts and a tank top shirt. I’m ready for summer to arrive. Also,  I didn’t want the boys to feel constricted this late in the night. I say late but its 11:41 on Saturday night.

When the hell did I get so old?

Saturday night, and I’m here writing a blog. Not just that, I’m calling it ‘late’ in the night. It was only a few years ago where around this time we would call the Taxi to go out. Now that I say that I realize how old I am. When I was going out we didn’t Uber to the club. Uber didn’t exist 5 years ago. Don’t quote me on that, maybe it did, but I wasn’t aware of it.

Anyway, I’ve really been meaning to write. I can’t seem to make time for myself. I just told Eliz how important it is to make some time for yourself. Even if it is on Saturday night. I don’t know why I’ve been putting off writing. Maybe it’s for the same reason I’ve been putting off taking pictures for Invictus Beard. Telling myself “Now is not a good time.”

I go through phases in life. I’m either all in on something or I’m procrastinating. I’m realizing Continue reading “Turkish Bath Mitten”

Moments

I’m becoming obsessed with moments. For instance, two nights ago it was my friends birthday. We all went out to dinner at a Brazilian steakhouse. Yeah, a vegetarian at a steakhouse. I walked into the belly of beast and came away unscathed. While we were all hanging out I was watching my friends and trying to take away the most out of the moment. Pretty soon I’ll be married. A few of them are in serious relationships too. These moments aren’t guaranteed. They’re fleeting. I feel I need to take full advantage of them.

A friend of mine that had not heard about my blog was also there. He wanted to read a post and I sat across from him while he did. That’s another moment I really enjoy. Watching people read a post of mine. I like to watch the look on their faces as they read. Are they entertained? Do they agree with my thoughts? I like to see the affect my writing has on them.

The past few days have been great. Yesterday, I went to a surprise congratulatory party for a friend of mine from high school. He accomplished a life long goal. He recently Continue reading “Moments”

Sold

I can’t pinpoint what it is. I’m thinking about it. What is making me feel this way. I don’t even know if I’m upset, uneasy, stressed, worried, anxious, none of the above or all the above. All I know is, I don’t like how I’m feeling right now. It’s only 8:30 on Sunday. I’ve already been up 2 hours. I took Niko to a park nearby. I meditated. I wrote in my journal. I should feel better.

We sold the house. For a great price. More than we expected to sell for. Another reason I should feel ecstatic. I did at first. Now, I feel as if it’s on to the next thing to worry about. Buying a house. I’m trying to think of it as an exciting opportunity. I’m doing my best to think in terms of Option 2. For whatever reason, I can’t seem to shake this feeling. It started last night. It’s been lingering since.

Maybe it’s because now we have this load of responsibility. We have access to a lot of cash once the sale of the house closes. What to do with all that money? What type of house do we buy? Is the market always going to stay this way? Is there a bubble? Is it going to crash? What kind of mortgage should we get? How much should we put towards a down payment? How much should we put away in a savings account? Should we invest it instead of a savings account? If so, what investments should we make?

Yeah. These questions are unanswered right now. I’m trying not to think about it all. I’m trying to take it step by step. We’d like to put some of the money away for our wedding. Maybe something for an investment property too. It’s just all happening quickly. The house market in Southern Ontario is crazy right now. We feel as though we need to act fast. House prices are Continue reading “Sold”

26th Birthday

It feels like a long time since I’ve written a post. I’ve been meaning to. I keep thinking about doing it. I’ve been busy. In other words, I’ve been procrastinating. I’m happy I’m doing it now.

To be honest some challenges I’ve faced in the past few weeks have been occupying most of my mind. At least it was. I’m moving past it. In one of my latest posts I mentioned cutting out toxic people. I’ve done it. Relatives. People that I grew up alongside. It’s not easy to just cut them out and then to keep moving as if nothing changed. It needed to be done. As I said, I don’t have room for negative people. I’m on my up. I had to offload unnecessary luggage. Continue reading “26th Birthday”