Listen

My routine has gone out the window. In the past few months, we’ve gone through so many changes it’s hard to keep track.

In March, we began preparing the sale of the house. A lot goes into that process. Clean up. Painting. Fixing the lighting. Getting the house in tip top shape for the buyers. Once we decided to sell, simultaneously, we began searching for a house. That also takes up a lot of time. Research, going to look at places, putting in bids, losing, starting all over again.

That all finished near the end of April, I think. Then we moved out of the house at the end of April. For two months, my entire routine was gone. Then we Continue reading “Listen”

Struggle

It’s been too long since I’ve written. I keep meaning to write but get side tracked. Many things have happened since I last wrote. I received my first comments on the blog from someone I don’t personally know. It was an incredible feeling to know my experiences may have helped someone in their lives. I moved to Waterloo, to my in-laws house. Eliz left for Cyprus to book our wedding venue. I moved in back to Mississauga to my parents house for the next 3 weeks, until Eliz gets back. The condo we sold didn’t close. The buyers backed out and now the condo is back on the market. All of this in 6 days. It’s safe to say I’ve been ‘busy.’

I’m not going to make the “I was too busy” excuse. I’ve had my opportunity to write but I’ve spend the time doing something else. Talking to Eliz, hanging out with family, going to play basketball, sleeping. I needed to do all those things. It’s been a stressful couple of days. The house not closing was a curve ball.

While all of this is going on I think I remained relatively happy. I’ve been working hard on it. Catching myself when Continue reading “Struggle”

Confidence

I never loiter anymore. It used to be one of my favourite past times. I don’t think I knew it at the time. I simply liked hanging out with my friends. It didn’t really matter where we are. I used to loiter on the front porch with friends in Brooklyn. I did it at parks in Hamilton. I would always hang out with friends outside the gym at university. This could go on for hours and oftentimes, it did.

I recall one time an acquaintance of mine asked if we had nothing better to do because we were just standing around “Wasting time.” I didn’t see it that way. Hanging out with friends, making jokes, talking about whatever, was not a waste of time in my opinion.

I miss it. Nowadays, all my friends are busy. Even though some of us live close to each other we see each other less and less. There are times we see each other at the gym but those are instances when we go to workout or play basketball. Since we are all working and have other commitments and responsibilities, we don’t just run into each other near the cafeteria and hang out for a few hours. We have to make time now.

It’s not always easy to make the time. Luckily, the past few days I was able to hang out with my two close friends individually. I had amazing conversations with both of them. I’m glad we were able to make time to talk. At the end of the one conversation my friend said Continue reading “Confidence”

Social Norms

What am I going to write about? Sometimes while I write I surprise myself with the ending. Somehow, I tie it all together. Or maybe I just think I do a good job of it. That’s enough for me right now.

We saw our place for the first time as the homeowners. My parents and sister saw it for the first time too. I could see the pride my dad had for me. It was a great feeling. Eliz was measuring everything like crazy and making her plans. She’s been working with her mom to put together a brand-new floor-plan. I’ve seen her work in the past and I can’t wait to see how she is planning to utilize all the space we have now.

I seriously have nowhere to go with this. At times, I think, this is a great thing to blog about but when I sit down to write, it doesn’t come to mind. I don’t wait for it either. I think if I were to just sit here and wait it wouldn’t be a pleasurable experience. I don’t want to think too much about what I’m writing. I don’t really have anyone proofread my work. I simply look out for the obvious spelling mistakes. Also, Word is helpful enough with the red and blue lines now that point out spelling and grammatical errors, respectively.

If I wanted to, I know I could ask a friend of mine to help me proofread. He has a great way with words. I aspire to be at that level. The more I read the wider my vocabulary gets. However, I feel pretentious Continue reading “Social Norms”

Turkish Bath Mitten

Let me give you the setting of this post. I just took a 30-minute hot bath. My legs were hurting today and I thought the heat would help. Worked like a charm. After the hot bath, I used a Turkish Bath Mitten to scrub dead skin off my body and took a freezing cold shower.

As I sit here, I’m wearing my swimming shorts and a tank top shirt. I’m ready for summer to arrive. Also,  I didn’t want the boys to feel constricted this late in the night. I say late but its 11:41 on Saturday night.

When the hell did I get so old?

Saturday night, and I’m here writing a blog. Not just that, I’m calling it ‘late’ in the night. It was only a few years ago where around this time we would call the Taxi to go out. Now that I say that I realize how old I am. When I was going out we didn’t Uber to the club. Uber didn’t exist 5 years ago. Don’t quote me on that, maybe it did, but I wasn’t aware of it.

Anyway, I’ve really been meaning to write. I can’t seem to make time for myself. I just told Eliz how important it is to make some time for yourself. Even if it is on Saturday night. I don’t know why I’ve been putting off writing. Maybe it’s for the same reason I’ve been putting off taking pictures for Invictus Beard. Telling myself “Now is not a good time.”

I go through phases in life. I’m either all in on something or I’m procrastinating. I’m realizing Continue reading “Turkish Bath Mitten”

Moments

I’m becoming obsessed with moments. For instance, two nights ago it was my friends birthday. We all went out to dinner at a Brazilian steakhouse. Yeah, a vegetarian at a steakhouse. I walked into the belly of beast and came away unscathed. While we were all hanging out I was watching my friends and trying to take away the most out of the moment. Pretty soon I’ll be married. A few of them are in serious relationships too. These moments aren’t guaranteed. They’re fleeting. I feel I need to take full advantage of them.

A friend of mine that had not heard about my blog was also there. He wanted to read a post and I sat across from him while he did. That’s another moment I really enjoy. Watching people read a post of mine. I like to watch the look on their faces as they read. Are they entertained? Do they agree with my thoughts? I like to see the affect my writing has on them.

The past few days have been great. Yesterday, I went to a surprise congratulatory party for a friend of mine from high school. He accomplished a life long goal. He recently Continue reading “Moments”

Choices

It’s tough for us right now. Searching for a house is time consuming. It’s in a different city so driving back and forth is taking its toll. ‘I don’t have time’ to go to the gym. ‘I don’t have time’ to read as often as I’d like. ‘I don’t have time’ to blog as much as I’d like.

I don’t say these things out loud because they are excuses. I write about how being busy is an excuse. How can I make excuses like these and tell people if I write the opposite? That would make me a hypocrite. I never say those things… out loud. Thing is, I’ve been saying it to myself. Reasoning with myself. Fooling myself. I shared this quote before but it is relevant here, it’s by Richard Feynman “The first principle is that you must not fool yourself and you are the easiest person to fool.”

This morning I ordered the Dvorak Keyboard. Took less than 5 minutes. Yet I’ve been telling myself to do it for weeks, if not months by now. The only difference between today and every other day I wanted to order the keyboard is the fact that I remembered to put it on the list this morning.

I did something different this morning. I sat down at the desk and asked myself what the most important small tasks are. Sometimes the tasks that only take 5, 10, 20 minutes are very important yet I Continue reading “Choices”